Notes on the Hanky Code

"God dild you"

It's Shakespeare. Ophelia says it in Act Four, Scene Five of Hamlet.

Well, God dild you! They say the owl was a baker's daughter. Lord, we know what we are, but know not what we may be. God be at your table!

In this case, "dild" means reward. However, when I played Laertes several years ago, I made it a point to plant the seed of what "God dild you!" might mean into the mind of the woman playing Ophelia. After she finished beating me to a pulp, she realized that it would take a supreme effort not to giggle every time she spoke that line, particularly since a) Ophelia's was supposed to be insane at that point and b) one of the most incredible lines in the play ("Lord, we know what we are...") follows immediately.


"Gipple? Laureola?"

Seinfeld. The only Seinfeld reference on this site. It was an early episode where Jerry is dating a terrific girl (if you're into that sort of thing) but forgets her name. He tries to figure out what it is by asking if she was teased about her name as a child. She replies, "Are you kidding? With a name that rhymes with a part of the female anatomy?" He spends the rest of the episode trying to figure it out. Finally, she cottons on to the fact that he's forgotten her name and confronts him. He tries to fake it, but she demands that he tell her what her name is. In desperation, he tries the names his friends suggested. "Mulva? [she starts to walk out] Gipple? Laureola?" [she closes the door behind her. He stands there dejected, then suddenly remembers and calls out the window:] "Dolores, WAIT!" Ah, the magic that was early Seinfeld.



From The Fifth Element, when Leeloo and Korben reach the ship to Fhloston, Leeloo presents her Multipass (ticket) and states, "Multipass" like that explains everything. My friend Bandit told me that when someone asks him what an orange hanky means, that is his complete response: "Multipass!"


Regarding Orange hankies

Thus we see how totally useless the hanky code really is, someone wearing an orange hanky in their right pocket may be saying, "I'm willing to bottom in any way you care to mention" or they may be saying "If you say more than three words to me, Master will beat me when we get home." You don't know which one, until you say "Hi there, hot stuff!" and see if he cringes.

There's also the additional issue of the meaning of "Anything." Anything? Really? 'Cos I really get off on removing a guy's fingers one by one with sulfuric acid. I'm sorry, that handkerchief is considered a colorimetric contract. Now come along.

Granted, I generally interpret orange to mean "There's a damn good chance that I'm going to say yes to whatever you suggest." Of course, there was someone who once told me that a handkerchief should be considered negotiable only if it had the traditional "bandits robbing a train" paisley pattern on it, otherwise a solid colored hanky was considered to be a non-negotiable requirement.

Granted, based on the general time-frame of when I recall that statement being made vis-a-vis my social history, that person was probably drunk off his ass at the time.


"Aluminum Zirconium Tetrachlorohydrex"

Common ingredient in antiperspirant.


"...hanky-panky guy"

From the song "Hanky Panky" by Madonna from the Dick Tracy Soundtrack. The basic "message" of the song is "I like to be spanked." I swear to everything that I hold dear that I am NOT a Madonna fan. I only know the song because it is a kick-ass song for doing the "Slap Leather" line dance. And now I've admitted to being a line-dancer. Sigh. So much for butch.


"So we'll sit on our faces..."

Line from the song "Sit on My Face" by Monty Python's Flying Circus. It's relatively plain that the song was framed in terms of "man (OK, men) singing to a woman" but I've uttered that phrase many times in my life, and it's never been to a woman.



This was an old Eddie Murphy bit from Saturday Night Live (when it was funny; yes, I'm old enough to remember way back then). Anyway, this is from "Mister Robinson's Neighborhood" (imagine Mister Rogers in the Projects). This was Mr. Robinson's word of the day. I still find this funny.



A coxswain (pronounced cox'n) is a term used in rowing. The coxswain sits in the back of the boat and shouts "Stroke, stroke" (It's more complicated than that, but that's where the humor comes in.)


"Brown Lace"

According to my friend littleDan, one can obtain brown lace from a certain fabric store in Paramus, New Jersey. Color me shocked.


"Grey Flannel Suit"

The Man in the Grey Flannel Suit was written by Sloan Wilson (made into a film starring Gregory Peck). The phrase refers to the new uniform of the men who entered the business world immediately after returning from World War II. It represents social stability and a very "clothes make the man" ideology. Although not grey flannel, I feel I must share this photo of Wade Neff in pin-stripes.


"Lie-la-lie, etc."

That's the chorus from "The Boxer" by Simon and Garfunkel.


On the Confederate Flag

The flag shown on the left is often referred to as the "Stars and Bars." According to Flags of the World (FOTW), the Stars and Bars does not properly refer to this flag. The flag shown on the left is properly known the battle flag of the Confederacy. The proper Stars and Bars (on the right) was the official flag of the Confederacy, but posed a significant problem on the battlefield, as it was too easily confused with the Stars and Stripes, so the Southern Cross became more well-recognized as the Confederate Flag. You can read about the many variations on the Stars and Bars and the Southern Cross on the FOTW pages about American Confederate Flags. (Having re-read the site and a couple of others, I've oversimplified the issue beyond belief. The only thing I can say unequivocally is that the flag on the right is the official Stars and Bars (seven star version). Read the sites if you've got time.